XPAT MADEIRA

If you happen to fall in love, expect to have to fall in love with the mother, too.

You must always agree with her, never question, she is right. Always turn up on Sunday for your dinner, this is expected and never say you don't like it, just grin and bear it. Never question when she rings and expects you to drop everything to go round and take her shopping and expect to take her shopping everytime you visit. Never encourage the father to have a drink, bad browny point, you're getting too close and he might let something slip. Expect to have a shadow each and everytime you go shopping, she will always want to be there. Always say nice things about her sewing, and take an interest or better still ask her to teach you. Never mention anything bad about your partner, ooops the backlash will be greater than you can imagine. Expect her never to get up out the chair when you arrive you must go to her and welcome her in her home.